Everything hurts and most days seem harder than the next and you just can’t help but think, when? When will this shit end? When will justice prevail and all oppressive systems and leaders fall? When will I see my people in safety and happiness? And it feels so hopeless somedays all the mobilizing, all the protests, all the attempts to outreach and bring political awareness. All the times we have fear eat us alive because we have to think and be extra careful with where we are seen and what we are doing if we ever try to be politically active because we fear denied entry. We fear imprisonment. We fear to speak out on campuses and somehow every time all the rules only apply when it’s a Palestinian kid behind the situation. And the constant need to be aware of your surroundings because there are people videotaping and taking your pictures to send to the governments the fear always and how uncomfortable it is to know ex IDF soldiers walk your campus, are teaching, are holding high positions within everything in the system that is used to keep us oppressed and exiled whenever we may be. Because exile is everywhere, you cannot escape it for it finds you whenever you may hide on nights all your efforts all your worries feel so hopeless. The refugees in the diaspora. The political prisoners who have been died and been born into these cold torturous prisons. That do not know what the sun looks on a hopeful day and how the olive trees grow to the resilience of Darwish’s metaphors. The children who have out lived 4 massacres and wonder what their fate is the next time around. Who stay up late and night and wonder “what if that was me on the beach that day? What if it is me on the beach in the coming days?” Where is safety within siege and occupation where is safety in a world where the occupied are constantly persecuted and blamed for their own occupation? Where is hope when we have days where children are shot and arrested on their way to school?
When is liberation
when is return
How much more can my people handle
My heart is with my Syrian friends and their families and the amazing people of Syria. May you know peace and healing soon and may you build your world anew. My solidarity doesn’t matter or make a difference. I just want this nightmare to stop. I love you and I believe in you.